The Girl on the Boat Read online

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  THE GIRL ON THE BOAT

  BY

  P. G. WODEHOUSE

  HERBERT JENKINS LIMITED3 YORK STREET LONDON S.W.1

  A HERBERT JENKINS BOOK]

  _Tenth printing, completing 95,781 copies_

  Printed in Great Britain by Butler & Tanner Ltd., Frome and London

  WHAT THIS STORY IS ABOUT

  It was Sam Marlowe's fate to fall in love with a girl on the R.M.S."Atlantic" (New York to Southampton) who had ideals. She was looking fora man just like Sir Galahad, and refused to be put off with any inferiorsubstitute. A lucky accident on the first day of the voyage placed Samfor the moment in the Galahad class, but he could not stay the pace.

  He follows Billie Bennett "around," scheming, blundering and hoping, sodoes the parrot faced young man Bream Mortimer, Sam's rival.

  There is a somewhat hectic series of events at Windles, a country housein Hampshire, where Billie's ideals still block the way and Sam comes onin spite of everything.

  Then comes the moment when Billie.... It is a Wodehouse novel in everysense of the term.

  ONE MOMENT!

  Before my friend Mr. Jenkins--wait a minute, Herbert--before my friendMr. Jenkins formally throws this book open to the public, I should liketo say a few words. You, sir, and you, and you at the back, if you willkindly restrain your impatience.... There is no need to jostle. Therewill be copies for all. Thank you. I shall not detain you long.

  I wish to clear myself of a possible charge of plagiarism. You smile.Ah! but you don't know. You don't realise how careful even a splendidfellow like myself has to be. You wouldn't have me go down to posterityas Pelham the Pincher, would you? No! Very well, then. By the time thisvolume is in the hands of the customers, everybody will, of course, haveread Mr. J. Storer Clouston's "The Lunatic at Large Again." (Those whoare chumps enough to miss it deserve no consideration.) Well, both thehero of "The Lunatic" and my "Sam Marlowe" try to get out of a tightcorner by hiding in a suit of armour in the hall of a country-house.Looks fishy, yes? And yet I call on Heaven to witness that I aminnocent, innocent. And, if the word of Northumberland Avenue Wodehouseis not sufficient, let me point out that this story and Mr. Clouston'sappeared simultaneously in serial form in their respective magazines.This proves, I think, that at these cross-roads, at any rate, there hasbeen no dirty work. All right, Herb., you can let 'em in now.

  P. G. WODEHOUSE.Constitutional Club, Northumberland Avenue.

  CONTENTS

  CHAPTER PAGE

  I. A DISTURBING MORNING 11

  II. GALLANT RESCUE BY WELL-DRESSED YOUNG MAN 27

  III. SAM PAVES THE WAY 56

  IV. SAM CLICKS 69

  V. PERSECUTION OF EUSTACE 95

  VI. SCENE AT A SHIP'S CONCERT 104

  VII. SUNDERED HEARTS 111

  VIII. SIR MALLABY OFFERS A SUGGESTION 126

  IX. ROUGH WORK AT A DINNER TABLE 144

  X. TROUBLE AT WINDLES 159

  XI. MR. BENNETT HAS A BAD NIGHT 180

  XII. THE LURID PAST OF JOHN PETERS 193

  XIII. SHOCKS ALL ROUND 207

  XIV. STRONG REMARKS BY A FATHER 217

  XV. DRAMA AT A COUNTRY HOUSE 227

  XVI. WEBSTER, FRIEND IN NEED 242

  XVII. A CROWDED NIGHT 257

  THE GIRL ON THE BOAT